Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Sermon thoughts: Submission between spouses!!


OK, I am going to put my head on the chopping board and blog about submission in a marriage! :(

Well, that’s because last Sunday, our worship sermon was on 1Peter 2:12-3:13.

This is by far the most sensitive issue for Christian marriage. I remember way back about 20 plus years ago when I was attending this young adult cell group in San Jose, California. One newly married couple spoke strongly against submission. The wife, a Taiwanese lady but raised in America claimed that the passage was “a mistake” in the Bible. Her American husband smiled and nodded. The discussion centered mostly on cultural issues, where submission was a Middle East ancient culture which women normally submit to men (father, brother, and husband). So, the group unanimously agreed that submission in marriage is subjective to culture and does not apply to Americans. Hooray!!

Back track couples of years when I was student in Polytechnic trained under the para-church, Navigators. In one of the leadership training session, my ministry leader made a profound statement which I still remember till this day. He said, “In any organization, system or animal group, there must only be one head (one leader). If there is no head, it is a demon. If there are 2 or more heads, it is also a demon. There must be only one head.” On reflection, this apply also to a family, there must be one head (one leader). Even in the Trinity Godhead, it is the Son submitting to the Father and never the Father submitting to the Son.

OK, so why can’t wife be the leader at home and husband submit to wife?

I know it is very hard for the sisters to swallow if I said that God told Eve that he (referring to Adam, her husband) will rule over her (Gen 3:16) after they sinned. Before they sinned, Eve is Adam’s helper (Gen 2:18-25). To be able to help someone means that you must be capable in order to be of help. It is only after they sinned that Adam is designated as the ruler of the home.

Frankly, I am ok that my wife wants to be the leader of the house. Since she wants to take leadership and there can be only one leader so that it is not a “demonized” home, I do my part and give love, respect and consideration to her (1Peter 3:7). But, sisters, bear in mind one day, you need to stand before God and answer Him: “Why do you want to be the leader of the home?”

Finally, to sisters who are not yet married: marry only a Christian man whom you can accept him as the leader of the home. If you can’t, he is probably not good for you.

Agape :)

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